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Ask for what's not on the menu
Start with the goal
The method starts with the goal. Ask what you are trying to achieve right now, what next big move gets you closer, and which asks, made of which people, would put that move into action. Staying playful and wide about what to request can bring people out of the woodwork to help.
Explore, then design the ask
People who don't yet know what to ask can begin with questions and explore the space around what they want. The step that follows is gathering enough information to see what role a person or organization can play in the goal, then designing something concrete and material to ask them for and making it. Questions alone stop short of that.
Why unusual asks work
Layoff rounds keep happening in and around Silicon Valley, budgets are tight, and promotions and raises are not easy to come by. A company can hand out advocacy and introductions at much lower cost, and unusual asks tend to make a person more memorable.
Why do introductions open more doors than applications?
Sociologist Mark Granovetter studied professionals in the Boston area who had recently changed jobs and reported the results in his 1973 paper The Strength of Weak Ties. More than half had found the job through a personal contact, far ahead of formal channels such as advertisements. Most of those contacts were acquaintances, not close friends. Acquaintances move in different circles and know about openings the person's closest friends do not.
Why do unusual requests make people memorable?
Psychiatrist Hedwig von Restorff published experiments in 1933 showing that an item that stands out from its surroundings is remembered better than the items around it. The finding is known as the von Restorff effect, or the isolation effect. A request that looks like every other request blends into the pile. One that differs from the others stays in memory.
Why are endorsements cheap for a company to give?
Advocacy and introductions cost the giver time but almost no budget, unlike raises and promotions, which add to payroll for as long as the person stays. Compensation is set in bands tied to a company's financial plan. Backing in a meeting or a referral to another team sits outside those bands. Economists describe this kind of nonmonetary benefit as one that costs far less to provide than it is worth to the person receiving it.
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