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She was the same person everywhere
Until he met her, her husband had been living the life he thought he was supposed to live and had been the person he thought others wanted him to be. Watching her be the same core person in every setting changed that. She never changed who she was.
Meeting her and seeing how she operates finally allowed him to be the person he wants to be. He calls it a gift and a kindness he could never replace.
Why do some people act the same everywhere?
Psychologist Mark Snyder introduced the self-monitoring scale in 1974 to measure how much people adjust their behavior to fit the audience. High self-monitors shift their style from one setting to the next. Low self-monitors act on their own attitudes and values wherever they are.
Why do people change across social settings?
Sociologist Erving Goffman argued in his 1959 book The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life that social interaction resembles theater. People perform differently on a front stage, where others watch, than in a back region where they relax. Each audience brings expectations, and people adjust to meet them.
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