He told his girlfriend of three years he was leaving for seminary, and she said she knew it was possible
Instead of arguing, she told him his calling was part of her story too.
Ascension Presents · I’ll Never Forget What My Ex-Girlfriend Told Me (w/ Fr. Mike Schmitz)One night, Mike Schmitz called his girlfriend to tell her he was leaving. He was weeping as he spoke.
Schmitz, then a missionary in Central America, had been dating the same woman for three years. After years of praying about his future, he had become convinced that God was calling him to enter seminary, the school where men train to become Catholic priests. In his church, priests do not marry, so going to seminary meant they would not stay together.
"I'm so sorry. I think I need to go to seminary next year," he said.
Schmitz, now a Catholic priest known as Father Mike, often retells the phone call because of what she said next. For him, it showed that not being chosen for one life does not mean being rejected as a person, a point he links to an old story about David and his older brother.
Her first words were, "Well, I knew this was a possibility before we started dating." She reminded him that they had talked about it even when they were just friends, when he had told her he was wrestling with whether he was called to the priesthood.
He kept saying he was sorry, and she told him to listen.
"No, listen. If this is what God wants for you, then this is what God wants for me, too. This is part of God's call in my life. This is part of God's story for my life," she said.
Schmitz compares her response to Eliab, David's older brother, who was not chosen to be king. In his telling, God did not pass over Eliab as a person, but told him, in effect, you just are not going to be king, because he had a different plan for him. He says his girlfriend was saying the same thing about herself, that his calling was part of God's story for her life too.
Questions people ask
Who is Father Mike Schmitz?
He is a Catholic priest in Minnesota known for teaching videos, podcasts, and talks for young people. He became widely known beyond his parish through his Bible and catechism podcasts, which walk listeners through scripture and church teaching. He often uses stories from his own life to explain questions about faith.
Who are David and Eliab in this story?
In the Hebrew Bible, David is the youngest son of Jesse, chosen to become king of Israel over his older brothers, including the eldest, Eliab. The prophet Samuel first looks at Eliab because he looks like a king, but God tells Samuel he has chosen David. Schmitz uses Eliab to represent everyone who watches someone else get picked.