Success means connecting with others and helping the world, she argues
Status and wealth do not track lasting contentment, while close ties and purpose do.
Make Me Smile with Miist · It Shouldn't Be That EasyMiist, a speaker thinking through failure and success, had come to a familiar snag. The commercial, political, and family world around her treated education, wealth, power, and fame as the scorecard, yet looking at what she called “the most educated, the wealthiest, as well as the poorest and least educated,” she saw no easy link to being truly happy and content.
Her proposal was to change the scorecard. In her words, success is not wealth, fame, or education, but “one's ability to connect with others in a grateful way and to help change the world around us by simple actions that are simply human.”
Her reason starts with the gap between having status and feeling content. She pointed to Elon Musk, whom she described as “arguably the richest man who has ever lived,” who recently said, “Whoever said money can't buy happiness really knew what they were talking,” followed by a sad emoji. She also cited a December 2025 poll in which, as she put it, “nearly 7 in 10 Americans” said they “feel pressure to appear happier than they are.”
By contrast, her claim is that studies repeatedly link happiness to relationships, purpose, and helping the world. That means close ties and connection with others, a sense that life has purpose, and contributing to something better, a pattern she said even small children display when delight follows being cared for, having friends and family nearby, and giving and getting thanks.
Part of the appeal, in her view, is that this kind of success stays within reach for ordinary people. To make the test personal, she invited reflection on the last time one felt deeply settled and joyful, rather than briefly excited by a purchase.
She then answered her own question with a family dinner, full of laughter and surrounded by people she loves and who love her. That moment happens “at least once a day” in her home, she said, and it is something the family can “consciously create” whenever, in her words, “we need it.”
Questions people ask
Is it really true that relationships predict happiness better than money?
Yes. The Harvard Study of Adult Development, which has followed participants for more than 80 years, found that close relationships and social connection were the strongest predictors of health and happiness in later life, more than money, fame, or social class. Other large reviews also find that loneliness and weak social ties carry health risks comparable to better known risks like inactivity.
If money doesn't buy happiness, why do so many people still chase it?
Money helps up to the point where basic needs, safety, and some security are met, but extra income adds less happiness over time. Researchers point to adaptation, since people adjust quickly to new purchases, while relationships and a sense of purpose keep providing meaning. Social pressure also pushes people to chase visible markers of success.
How could I tell if I am succeeding by connection and purpose?
Researchers often ask about the quality of close relationships, how often people feel appreciated or supported, and whether they feel their daily activities matter to others. Small daily signals can work too, like sharing a meal, expressing gratitude, or doing one helpful act. The point is frequency and warmth, not grand achievements.